"So this is the foundation for my
internet diary - searching for the
truth and seeing what else comes
along on the way."
05.19.99 diary entry
Cast of Characters
Thoughts of the Day
Quote of the Day:
"Fate is like a strange, unpopular restaurant, filled with odd waiters who bring you things you never asked for and don't always like."
The Slippery Slope by Lemony Snicket
Usually I can't just lie on my bed and watch TV without getting restless, but when it's almost ninety degrees inside this becomes a pleasant pursuit. During a break from class today I decided that I was going to write a diary entry while getting my weekly dose of the WB (7th Heaven and Everwood). It's not starting the way I intended, with my Palm Pilot instead of my laptop, but this is my attempt to fulfill that goal.
The most notable thing in millions of lives these days, including mine, is the unseasonable Los Angeles heat. After a similar episode early last week, the temperature dropped and a high of seventy-five degrees felt like heaven. But the few days of LA winter weather were fleeting and now it's hot again. I set my alarm for 6 AM so I could get the day started while it was still cool, but even sunrise made my apartment uncomfortably warm. No matter how much I was dreading going to class today I am sure it was more agreeable than sitting at home and sweating. This is a realization that could not have been made while I was struggling to stay awake during a make-up class from 4-6 PM.
I was actually struggling in more ways than one during that class today. "As we sat in class Sevan and Jonathan quickly scribbled down notes and nodded their heads as Dr. Smith taught for two hours. I, on the other hand copied everything down, but didn't nod once. I understood nothing." This quote was intended for a webpage update on April 20, but the thought wasn't completed at the time. Perhaps it was a bit premature because two days later, on April 22, I wrote another unfinished update that seemed to wrap up the thought. "Imagine what it's like to sit through a lecture on a topic on which you have no previous knowledge. Then imagine sitting through a lecture on a topic you know a little about, but whose specifics are completely over your head. The latter is the more frustrating scenario." I don't think I could better express the way I felt in class today than with these almost forgotten sentences. Sevan and I were so discouraged that we started writing on the tables in the lecture hall. He started with the classic, "Kill me please!" To which I responded, trying to cheer him up, with a smattering of combustion lab jokes. It's debatable whether either of us felt any better, but at least it took our minds off the academic torture for a few brief moments. I think students deserve credit just for surviving some classes. I wasn't sure I would make it through today, but when I walked out of the room I left this evidence of my suffering behind.
I watched 7th Heaven in blissful inactivity and dug my Palm Pilot out of my backpack when Everwood started at 9 PM. Now it's almost over and I haven't written nearly enough for a diary entry. You'd think an hour would be plenty of time to write what little constitutes one of my diary entries. Then again I won't know the actual extent of these paragraphs until I download the file onto my computer, but it's still too hot to have that (possibly ant-infested, thanks to my lab) contraption anywhere near me.
So it�s time to switch to the Travel Channel or the National Geographic Channel. I'm so content at the moment that I imagine I could lie here and watch teen television until class time tomorrow, but that genre has played itself out for tonight. Now I'll watch some programming that makes me envious, due to my intense desire to travel, rather than reminding me how difficult adolescence is for everyone. I've stopped watching Jeopardy! at 7PM, which usually just has the effect of making me feel stupid, in favor of Rick Steves' Europe. If I had to admit to being jealous of someone, Rick Steves would be the first person to come to mind. He travels all over the world and manages to earn a living at the same time. That's my definition of the perfect job. Thanks to him I'm planning a trip to the Alps this summer, if only in my dreams.
After lying here for three hours scratching this diary entry into my Palm Pilot I remember times when I would write several of them in a week, sometimes one a day. It just came easily and at this moment I can remember how that felt. I am writing exactly what I want to say. That's not always an easy thing to do, as illustrated by my lack of entries over the last three years. I can only hope that this feeling will last. Maybe it won't result in more frequent diary entries, but it makes me feel good. I'll try to remember this feeling more often.